Big Announcement – Bowel Movement Movement

Normally Poop Office makes an appearance in Baltimore Comic-Con‘s Artist Alley, but it was mysteriously absent this past September. What’s going on?!

Well, to put it simply, I moved from the DC/Baltimore area way out to Southern California! With all the stress and commotion of the move, there just wasn’t time to plan for the con this year.

Poop Office Bowel Movement Movement

Poop Office is on the move!

Now that the poops and I are settled in this crazy new state, I have tons of stuff in the works for Poop Office. Here are some highlights:

  • For those still back in Maryland, Poop Office will be attending the Baltimore Comic-Con in 2017. We love that show so much, all the poops are going to pack into an airplane and fly out!
  • For those on the west coast, I’m looking into reserving tables at conventions in the area. So if you ever find yourself in Long Beach, AnaheimSan Jose, San Diego, or maybe even Portland and Seattle, you just might run into some poop in 2017 or 2018. I’ll put updates here and on my social media pages as plans firm up.
  • With six issues of Poop Office out, I am hard at work on the Poop Office collected edition! It’s currently planned to be about 200 pages with tons of extras and bonus content including some Poop Office comics that never appeared online or in any of the comic book issues. I’m hoping to have it all done and for sale at 2017’s Baltimore Comic-Con. And like the comic book issues, the print edition will be in beautiful black & white while the digital version will be in full color.
  • In addition to all that, I have several (early) plans for more comics and related merchandise in the Poop Office universe, but it’s too early to talk about all that.

If any of you are on the west coast and know of some great shows that would be a good fit for Poop Office, please contact me by email or Twitter and let me know!

 

 

 

Want to know about an easter egg in the image above that only I care about? I spent about three months in 2015 fixing up the homemade font I use for all my comics, and this is the first chance I’ve gotten to use it! Notice how much cleaner and fancier it looks than the old ugly font used in all my other comics? Probably not. But I do!!

Awesome Con DC 2016 Aftermath!

Awesome Con DC was two weeks ago! I’m a little late on this one, but cut me some slack. I had a lot to recover from, including this awesome fan art (which put me in the same company as Tom King, Franco, and Sam Ellis!). I also got to do two T-shirt sketches (those are drawings on T-shirts, not of T-shirts), which is a first.

Poop Office Fan Art

What wasn’t a first was hearing lots of interesting stuff at the table! So without further ado, here’s the greatest hits. There are a lot, but that’s just because people are very talkative in Washington, DC.

  • Oh, it’s actually a comic.
  • Somebody needed to do this.
  • I am not embarrassed to say that I want to buy these.
  • Kid: Can I get one of these? Mom: Seriously?
  • It is poop. And it’s beautiful.
  • (Explaining why the plush dolls shouldn’t have happy expressions) Could you imagine a smiling poop? Look in the toilet and it’s smiling back at you? That’s like something out of Stephen King.
  • Poop! (Caresses the catnip toys) Precious poop!
  • ¡Mierda!
  • (To his friend) This is where I got the poop plushie you see me cuddling with all the time.
  • This is wrong. This is just wrong! Ugh, I just…
  • Me: You can look through the comics if you like. Kid: Eh.
  • (Mother talking to her child) It’s poop acting like people. That’s called “personification.”
  • This actually makes me want to go to the bathroom.
  • Husband: It’s poop. Wife (deadpan): Yeah, I know.
  • My brother texted me and said, “Get me a poop action figure.” What is that?
  • I have great respect for you people.
  • (Regarding the poop action figures) Eww, they’ve been up somebody’s butt! (Not actually true)
  • You guys have poop action figures? Oh my gawd!
  • If I got one of these [plush dolls] for Christmas I could sleep better at night!
  • (Picks up a poop action figure with a blank expression drawn on it) This one, it captures my soul.
  • (Little kid) Why are you doing a comic about poop?!
  • Babe, I want a turd!
  • It’s a potato!
  • Fecal matter is everywhere.
  • Poop Office! Yay! (Begins clapping their hands)
  • (Looking at the “#2 Boss” mug) Hashtag two boss.
  • (Looks at cover of issue #4) Mom: Eww, the water’s yellow. Kid: Yeah, because it’s pee.
  • I’m pretty sure if I got something like this for my husband he would get in trouble at work.
  • This is the poop center.
  • Your booth made me laugh in the best way possible.

And now for the specialty categories!

Signs that Poop Office is famous:
  • This is funny from last year.
  • Here’s the poop table!
  • I’m so excited the poop people are here!
  • This is the poop man.
  • Poop Office is famous. Everyone is talking about it.
Most Creative Award (using Poop Office products to insult each other):
  • Person #1: (Points to one of the poop button and says to friend) This is you! Person #2: (Points to issue #2) This is your mom! (Person #1 points to plush) This is your brother!
Most Self-Aware Award:
  • Guy: I appreciate this. Me: I appreciate you appreciating this. Guy again: You’d probably appreciate me more if I bought something. (He didn’t buy anything)
Most Educational Award (for teaching me that calling someone an egg is a thing):
  • We need to throw this at [our friend] when he’s being an egg.
All Around Winner Award:
  • (Regarding the action figures marked as free) Does this pay any dollars?

In case you’re wondering, no the free poop action figures you can pick up at our convention appearances do not pay any dollars. But they are free.

Baltimore Comic-Con 2015 Aftermath!

Baltimore Comic-Con

I’m still recovering from what was our most successful Baltimore Comic-Con yet! It was a great convention this year. The weather was nice. The people were nice. And I got to see Edward James Olmos‘ mustache from 30 feet away!

This was also the first con that we tried advertising in the bathroom. They were only up for a few hours on Friday before the convention center staff cleaned them up, so I think we probably weren’t allowed to post stuff there. Oh well. Maybe next time! We got compliments about the ads, so I thought I’d post it here for anyone who missed it.

You smelled the poop. Now read the comic!

Big thanks to everyone who came by to see us. For those who couldn’t make it, Poop Office #6 is now available in digital form on the store page. If you’re a ComiXology fan, I’m working on getting Poop Office #6 up there, too. It’ll probably be a few weeks, though.

Anyway, let’s get to the main event! Here’s what people were saying around the Poop Office table this year:

  • I think [our cat] would like that [catnip toy]. She needs it!
  • I’m looking for a special poop.
  • (Pointing at the cover to issue #4) Is that piss in the water jug? Oh god. I’m done. (leaves)
  • I want to laugh but I don’t want to be insulting.
  • (Re: poop plush) Child: I want one of these. Parent: No!
  • I gather you guys love bowel movements.
  • Poop, there it is!
  • This is a very attractive nuisance for children.
  • Oh look, it’s the poops again!
  • Power Girl: I have to say that was really slick putting ads in the stalls. Frickin’ brilliant.
  • You guys keep doing what you’re doing.
  • Alright, give me the shit!
  • I’m sure you get this a lot — they look like burnt chicken nuggets.
  • (While taking someone’s photo in front of the plushes) Say ‘Poop’!
  • I’m gonna get in trouble for this, but… (buys something)
  • I don’t like this. I don’t like it because it’s poop.
  • Look! Little shits!
  • (Girl had whole stuffed poop collection at home) I got poop! This is my third poop doll!
  • (Regarding his wife) Of all the comics I bought, this one upset her the most.
  • Really? Shit art?
  • I look forward to reading these, God help me.
  • (After handing him the free sketch I did for him) Last year you were the best buy of the convention. This year you’re the best sketch.
The winner in the “I can’t remember if it was the mom or the child who liked/disliked Poop Office” category is:
  • Mom: But it’s poop! Child: Mom, you just don’t understand.

Baltimore Comic-Con 2015

Baltimore Comic-Con

Poopert and the rest of the gang from Poop Office (including me) are back to stink up Charm City this weekend! We’ll all be at the Baltimore Comic-Con at table A70. Stop by and fart hello!

Poop Office @ Table A70

I'll see you in Baltimore!

 

HeroesCon 2015 Aftermath!

I’m still recovering from this weekend’s HeroesCon. It was our first trip there. I’d heard about how great this convention was my whole life, and it definitely lived up to the hype! Charlotte’s a beautiful city, the con was a true celebration of comic books, and the evening events had free guacamole! What more could you ask for? I want to send a big thank you to everyone we met this weekend! We definitely had a lot of fun and will probably be returning to HeroesCon sometime in the future.

Poop Office's table was right next to the bathroom

Our table was literally right next to one of the bathrooms. It was so right next to it that people pointed it out more than once every 10-15 minutes (seriously, we counted), which was fun!

Here are some other things people said to us:

  • I want to hold your poop in my hands.
  • That’s so funny, I’m gonna die.
  • It’s poop time.
  • It’s awkward going to the bathroom right next to the poop sign.
  • I don’t condone this.
  • This needs to be made into a motion picture.
  • I would invest in this.
  • (Mother of two children joins them at the table) Of course this is where I would find my boys.
  • (Smells one of the plush dolls) This smells like a stuffed animal.
  • (Notices we’re right next to the bathroom) They got the Poop Office next to the poop office!
  • This is probably the only time where you’d say, “Yes! I got seated next to the bathroom!”

There were a few kids that thought we were selling potato/peanut merchandise:

  • Daddy, look! Potatoes!
  • Look, potato people!
  • It’s a peanut!

This con’s winner is the guy who managed to see through my entire scam!

  • Really… you sell stuffed brown pillows and call it poop?

Honorable mention goes to the “y’all” comments we got:

  • Y’all are hilarious.
  • Y’all are brilliant.
  • Y’all are crazy, you know that?

And now please take a moment of silence to remember those that didn’t make it:

Dead poops

RIP Smashy, Sleepy, Scar, and Befuddled

 

HeroesCon 2015

HeroesCon

Poop Office is will be appearing at yet another convention! This time we’ll be at HeroesCon in Charlotte, North Carolina at the Charlotte Convention Center June 19-21. Follow the stink to Table AA-63 in Artist Alley, in the very back-right corner of the convention hall next to the restrooms.

HeroesCon Map

Awesome Con DC 2015 Aftermath!

Awesome Con

We had a fantastic time at Awesome Con DC this past weekend! It was great meeting everyone and spreading our poop around such a beautiful city.

Following my regular post-convention tradition, here are some funny things that were said at the Poop Office table:

  • What the fuck?! Really?! Oh, you guys again! Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!
  • (Looking at a poop plush) Child: Why is he sad? Mom: Because he doesn’t like his job.
  • You are the best trollers since trolling began.
  • I’ve never said “aww” about poop before.
  • (Touches poop plush) That’s the softest poop I’ve ever felt.
  • (Points at two poop plushes placed behind a smaller catnip toy) It’s a poop family!
  • We poop all day and we party all night!
  • I don’t get the poop thing. (The premise is explained to them) Okay, that makes sense.
  • Mom (reading the slogan on our T-shirt): “Do you think your job stinks?” Child: No, I think your job stinks!
  • (Referring to our poop action figures, which look like but are not candy) I was gonna eat poop.
  • Why?
  • You must work for the government.
  • I wanna drop a turd in my boss’s office.
  • That’s gross. It’s beautiful, though.
  • Wait, that’s a toilet?
  • I’m not paying for poop.
  • (Looks at the table for a while) Eh! (Leaves quickly)
  • *I don’t have the exact quote, but someone explained to me why anal sex is gross (answer: the poop)*
And the winner for best line from Awesome Con goes to…
  • (Gestures to a Poop Office comic book) They’re made of molecules. Everything is made of molecules. Even paper, trees, if you look really close, it’s made of molecules.
 Later this month we’re going to be appearing in Artist Alley at HeroesCon in Charlotte, North Carolina (June 19-21), so if you’re in the area, stop by and see us! Just look for the giant Poop Office signs.

Poop Office Banner

Poop Office for free at Gorilla King Comics on May 2

If you’re going to be in the Fells Point area of Baltimore, Maryland for Free Comic Book Day this Saturday, May 2, stop by Gorilla King Comics. They’ll be offering some free copies of Poop Office along with all kinds of other cool stuff! There’s even a sale and a raffle going on! That’s good!

Gorilla King Comics - Poop Office comics will be available free on Free Comic Book Day this Saturday, May 2!

It’s that time of year again!!!! Free comic book day is coming up on May 2nd, and we’re going to be having tons of FREE…

Posted by Gorilla King Comics on Friday, April 24, 2015

They’re located at 1711 Aliceanna St, Baltimore, Maryland 21231.

Poop Office – The Job Inturdview

To celebrate National Boss’s Day, take this new Job Inturdview character quiz and
find out which empooyee you’re the most like!

Poop Office - The Job Inturdview

Click the image above to take the quiz.

 

Baltimore Comic-Con 2014 Aftermath!

Hey, check out this crappy photo I took of my table with my iPad. The camera on this thing sucks.

Baltimore Comic-Con table

But y’know what didn’t suck? This year’s Baltimore Comic-Con! It was bigger and longer than ever! I got to meet a lot of really nice folks and see some old friends. I also bought some comics and met Joel from MST3K. He was sitting next to Chewbacca.

Some interesting things were also said at my table. Here’s a list of the best:

  • Adorbs!
  • I love Poop Office.  So does everybody in my office!
  • This piqued my interest for some reason.  I’m concerned about myself.
  • You seem like the right one to ask: Where are the bathrooms?
  • I feel weird holding a poop in my hand.
  • You guys are disturbed. But I like it.
  • This has been the talk of the town all day.
  • My son loves his doodie
  • [To her friend after pointing at Poopina on the cover of issue #2] That’s you!
  • That’s ingenious and disgusting.
  • [Choosing a button to buy] I’ll take the one with the penis.
  • Child: This is the best thing I’ve seen in my entire life.
    Mom: You’re young.
  • Child: Mom, would you like a [poop] action figure?
    Mom: I can make my own myself, thanks.
  • [Buys his wife a poop button] Don’t say I never bought you shit!
  • Why can’t I have an action figure in the bathroom?
    [His girlfriend responds] You make plenty of action figures in the bathroom.
  • I’m so glad that this exists.
  • I think this is the best thing I’ve seen here today.
  • I can’t wait to tell everyone!
  • I can’t stand it. I’m in love.
  • [To her kids] No Poop Office, c’mon!
  • Here’s Poop Office! [To his friend] Huh, I thought this was something you were making up.
  • Oh my god… [more distressed] Oh my god… [minute or two later] Oh my god…This is really interesting.
  • Mom, are you having fun smelling the poop?

And the winner for best thing said at my table at this year’s Baltimore Comic-Con goes to something that was said to my editor-girlfriend who was sitting next to me at the table and helps me sell poop stuff…

Not to offend you or anything, but you have the most masculine handshake of any woman I’ve met today.